SETUP PLANNER
How should you share your holiday home?
Seven questions about the things that actually go wrong: knowing what's free, who runs the house, what people pay, who sees what, and how full the calendar should be. At the end you get the setup your answers point to — what to turn on, what to leave off, and where we'd honestly send you somewhere else.
Most people arrive here looking for a private version of Airbnb: the same shared calendar and clear costs, without the public listing, the reviews, or the cut taken out of what family pay you. Whether that's what you need depends on how your house already works.
What it asks about
Each one is a decision that actually matters when a house is shared privately — and most owners have never made them deliberately. Getting the money one right is the hardest: most people just want to cover costs, but pitch it wrong in either direction and the calendar empties.
- 01Who stays at your house?
- 02How does anyone find out whether the house is free?
- 03Who actually runs the house?
- 04What do people pay to stay?
- 05How should the money side work?
- 06Who should see what?
- 07How full is the calendar — and how full do you want it?
And what it recommends from
Every recommendation is something the app does. Nothing here is aspirational.
- The house page
- Photos, a description and the practical details, in one place that everyone you invite lands on.
- Shared calendar
- One calendar everyone sees, colour-coded by whether a stay is requested, approved or confirmed.
- Blocked dates
- Close off the weeks you're using it yourself, or when the house is shut for the winter.
- Imported calendars
- Pull in an iCal feed from anywhere the house is already let, so those dates block automatically.
- Seasons
- Date ranges that carry their own cost per night, cleaning contribution, deposit percentage, minimum nights, and whether dates need approving.
- House Guide
- The WiFi password, how the heating works, where the stopcock is, and where to eat.
- Amenities
- What the house has — beds, pool, parking, cot, WiFi — so nobody has to ask.
- Request a Stay
- The extension that lets people pick dates on the calendar and put them forward.
- Request-only dates
- Puts a season into request mode, so dates come to you before they're held.
- Auto-approval by group
- Lets chosen groups book straight into the calendar without waiting for you.
- Groups
- Groups like Family, Friends or Caretaker. Each one carries its own rate, its own approval rules, and its own view of the house.
- Invitations
- A link per group. Whoever opens it joins that group, with that group's rates and permissions.
- Permissions
- Four levels — Admin, Can manage, Can edit, Can view & book — separate from what anyone pays.
- A group for your caretaker
- Every group has its own list of visible features — so some people see the calendar and nothing else.
- Booking Visibility
- Lets people see who else has upcoming stays, not just their own.
- Notice Board
- Announcements everyone sees — or just certain groups. Boiler service, new key safe code, seasonal reminders.
- Guestbook
- Photos and notes from people who've stayed, building up over the years.
- Gift Stays
- A one-off link for someone outside the circle. Free, a fixed price, or a percentage off — with a limit on nights, which seasons, and when it expires.
- Share link
- A private link that shows the house to someone without an account — with separate switches for availability and rates.
- Notifications
- In-app and push alerts when someone requests dates, marks a payment, or a stay needs attention.
- Cost per night & cleaning
- A cost per night and a cleaning contribution per season, then a rate per group on top.
- Cost Visibility
- Shows what a stay will cost on the calendar and in the stay details, before anyone commits.
- Payment tracking
- They mark it sent, you mark it received. Two-sided, so a record exists without anyone chasing.
- Deposits
- A percentage of the stay, due a set number of days after approval — with the option to release the dates if it doesn't arrive.
- When the balance is due
- On arrival, 7, 14 or 30 days before, or 7 or 14 days after departure — decided once, applied to every stay.
- Usage Costs
- Post-stay extras — firewood, electricity, pool heating — recorded after departure and billed separately.
- Reports
- What the house took over a period, what's outstanding, and who it's outstanding from.
- To-Do List
- A shared list for the house — jobs, things to buy, things to fix — with assignees and priorities.
- Calendar export
- Subscribe to the house calendar from Google Calendar, Apple Calendar or Outlook.
- Start with the demo
- A real house, fully set up, that you can click around before deciding anything.
Common questions
Is there a private version of Airbnb for family and friends?
Not on Airbnb itself — a listing is public by design, and the fees and reviews come with it. What people usually want is a private tool that does the same coordinating job: one shared calendar, a way to agree dates, costs that can differ between family and friends, and a record of who has paid. Lope & Lark is built for exactly that, and your house never appears in a search result.
How do I share my holiday home privately without listing it?
Set the house up with photos, a description and a calendar, then invite people by link. Each link belongs to a group — family, friends, or one you name yourself — and whoever opens it joins that group with its rates and permissions. Nobody can find the house otherwise, and you can remove anyone at any time.
How do I get my holiday home used more by family and friends?
Remove the asking. An underused holiday home is almost always a friction problem, not a demand problem: nobody can see what's free, nobody's sure what it costs, and every stay starts with an awkward message to the owner. A shared calendar people can check without asking, visible costs pitched to cover the bills, and auto-approval for the people you'd never say no to will do more for occupancy than any amount of encouraging.
What should I charge family and friends to stay at my holiday home?
Most owners just want to cover costs — cleaning, utilities, wear and tear — and that's the right instinct. Work out what a night genuinely costs and charge exactly that: high enough that the house stops costing you money, low enough that nobody hesitates to come. Costs that vary by stay, like heating or firewood, work better billed separately afterwards so the nightly rate stays low. If you want family and friends to pay different amounts, set a rate per group rather than negotiating each time.
Can I control who sees costs and who else is staying?
Yes, per group. Each group of people has its own view of the house: whether they see what a stay costs, whether they see other people's bookings, and which features exist for them at all. Friends can see rates and the shared calendar while your parents see neither — the same house feels open to one group and strictly private to another.
How do payments work if there's no platform fee?
Money moves directly between you and whoever stayed — bank transfer, Revolut, cash, whatever you already use. The app tracks the record rather than the money: they mark a payment as sent, you mark it as received, and both sides can see what's outstanding. There is no fee on a stay, ever. The only cost is £9 a month for the house.
What if the house is also let commercially?
Keep the commercial side where it is and import its iCal feed, so those weeks show as blocked on the private calendar. The two never mix: nobody on the letting platform sees your family's stays, and your family never see the commercial bookings by name.
Do family and friends have to pay to use it?
No. Only the owner subscribes, at £9 a month per house. Everyone invited uses it free, and there's no per-person charge however many people you invite.
Related guides
Private Airbnb alternative for family homes — why sharing privately wins
Why a tool built for strangers doesn't work for family — and what to use instead.
Share your holiday home with family and friends — a practical guide
Setting up a system that keeps everyone happy — from calendars to costs to house rules.
Split holiday home costs fairly (without the awkward conversations)
Per-night rates, tiered pricing, deposits, cleaning, and tracking who's paid.